Cohesive Devices Exercise

In today’s ever growing society, athletes are becoming more and more spotlighted in the media. @[That is to say that] an increase in the publicity of these athletes means that there are more opportunities to learn about how athletes train to become better. @[Sometimes,] they use steroids to gain a greater edge and get caught by their league. @[Thus,] the message that is sent to young people in today’s society is that it is ok to take steroids as long as you are not caught, and if you are caught the only penalty is some kind of fine or suspension. You rarely, if ever, hear of any side effects that steroids have. In my paper, I will discuss a policy that I have formulated with regard to steroid use. *My policy will be that there is a need to educate people on the effects of steroid use to decrease steroid use. @[Specifically,] People need to be educated on the physical effects that steroids have on the body, the mental effects that steroids have on the body, and the costs that steroids incur on society, especially the sports world. I think that I have a sufficient number of sources that will allow me to write an effective policy. If I find I need more information I can always do more research but I do not think that will be necessary.

I think that this exercise was useful. It made me analyze my writing, how I write, and how I can make changes. I do not usually think about cohesive devices when I write or edit, but now I might use this exercise when I write and edit so that I can make my paper stronger. It was also helpful in making sure everything flows well and making sure that everything is supported.